i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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