Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
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