i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
