So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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