just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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