It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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