If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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