I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
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