I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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