hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
its not stalking. its research.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
