i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
