I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
