We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
You dont lie about slip and slides
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
