I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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