went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
