people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
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we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
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