never play flip cup with pint glasses
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
