I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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