Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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