Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize