If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
