my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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