11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
i think my tv is drunk
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
there was a trapeze. enough said
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
