I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
