Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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