If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
