Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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