I will die if light touches me.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
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