found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
