Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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