Already got asked if we're dating
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Randomize
