my soul wont recognize me after tonight
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
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