i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
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