Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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