I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
