you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
