she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
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I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
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I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
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