Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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