STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
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This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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