Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize