I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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