Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Randomize
