i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
