The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
