they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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