I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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