he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize