So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
