K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
