I swear she didn't look like that last week.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Randomize
