I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
